What does that mean exactly? Have you ever watched some one build a house? The more time, detail and love the builder puts into the home, the more it can with stand. When he just hastily slops some walls up, slaps some shingles on, the more likely it is going to fall apart.
The more time, detail and love you put into a family the longer it will stand and change the way your children view family and life.
The time that is? (this was my journal entry for the Contemporary Challenge) To my dear sweet Contemporaries, Sorry I have been lacking in the Challenges for the month but it is a time issue. You know finding the time to do all you want to do. So this challenge is for March and April, do find time for all you have to do? Whether you work away from home or you are at home all day, do you find time and energy and apply it to the ones you love. Or are you like me, who is home all day, there for around the ones I love, but find myself saying not now. "Mommy will you play with me?" "Mommy, can you read me a story?" "Mommy hold me." Words I hear all day long but sadly rarely act upon, because allas I am busy. Busy with what? Chores, life, blogging, the list is long but it is poor. Because the stuff will be there when I am done playing with my monkeys. The stuff will be around as long as I am around. My sweet children, I have eighteen maybe nineteen years with them, and they will be gone. So my challenge to you and myself is this. Stop, what we are doing you know the stuff and give the love our loved ones need. Including our husbands. Our homes will be okay for those few fleeting minutes, our world will not be upset. But our loved ones in those minutes we impact them for the rest of their lives. Basically we all have choices, what will you choose? What will I choose? We are give children and husbands for but a vapor. How will we treat and love those for that minute? Are they given to us to serve us, to please us, to make us happy or is it the other way around? I promise they can never fill the first, they can improve the life we have but they can never be enough. How can we teach them what is important if we do not stop to show them they are important. That life is short and sweet, that we are truly thankful the blessing of their life. Life is not all about us or them it is about serving God and teaching them the same. We need to love them, take time with them. It doesn't mean video games or movies it means, games, hugs, kisses and loves.
Ahhhhh! It is catalog season for curriculum's. Oh the pain of it all. Well if you home school your either like whats the big deal or I know right. If you can not understand just laugh at it all. You see for the last five years, right now, every time, this time of year, I am overwhelmed with choices. Oh the choices, if only you knew. It is not even that I dislike what we used this year, in fact I love most of it. The problem is all of the catalogs make me want to try something new and different. I mean they all look so good, why not change again? Why can I not just stick to what we love? Everything is so enticing. Last year I changed what I was using with the little guy and gal and ended up buying a second curriculum because it just didn't click with them. I ended up using the same publisher as last year. My oldest she just goes with the flow, the poor thing is my guinea pig. I know what I am not going to change for next year but what about what I want to change. Here is the kicker I thought I had everything picked out since January, now with the help of stickin' catalogs I don't know anymore. Last year I chose not to pray about my decisions. That is a very bad choice, so this year, I have already started to pray, it is a toss up. Here is my big dilemma I do not want to fail God or my children as we educate them at home. We as parents want them to be able to compete with their peers and succeed. Mostly though I want an instant God with an instant answer, but I know that is not how He works. Sigh oh the waiting and looking, could kill a girl.
Do you thank God for everything that comes your way or just the good things? In Job chapter 2, Job, rebukes his wife for wanting to curse God for the bad things that had happened to him. Job, himself lost all his earthly wealth, his children were dead and he was physically afflicted with sores, rotting skin, never ending pain and was starving to death because food no longer had flavor. Even in those conditions he chose to praise God. He replied, "You are talking like a foolish woman. Shall we accept good from God, and not trouble?" In all this, Job did not sin in what he said. Job 2:10 I love nature, I love God's creation to be in it and be in awe of the greatness of it all. It is so easy to thank him for a warm spring breeze, a warm spring day and even a spring shower. What about the pollen, He created that too? Here in the South you have about two weeks where you can leave your windows open to cool or warm your home after that, POLLEN. I guess you could leave your windows open, if you do not have allergies or like everything being covered in yellow dust. Here it is thick and yellow and covers everything you own, even your children. You can rinse your cars off in the morning just to have them yellow by lunch. We don't have smog in the spring we have pollen fog. Go for a run or walk and cars just dust you with pollen. It would be like living in Seattle and taking a walk after it has rained and every car that passes you covers you with water. Here it is pollen. My black hair looks like a bumble bee. It is very easy to to complain about pollen. It is very easy to not thank God or praise Him for pollen. Really, why would you want to? Well, if we did not have pollen, flowers, plants and trees would not blossom and grow. In a couple of months you would miss the beauty that pollen lives behind. You would miss the life it gives to all the life outside. Pollen also shows us something about God, His persistence and constant love. God's love is sticky you don't get it when you want it and wash it off when you don't. He just comes back even thicker and stronger. Saying I still love you, there is no place you can not go with out me. I cover everything. So I am going to chose to praise and thank God for that yucky sticky stuff. Which he uses to uniquely add color and life to this world around us. Try today with me just one time to say thank you God, for the precious reminder of his greatness and love.
I love running, I love to get out and go and I can go for miles (8miles). I am like a tortois though, slow and steady. I am in pretty good shape, carido wise (so I thought). I wanted to shave time off my run and my sweet Husband said, there is no way you run that slow. Well, Saturday, we jogged together, I learned I have room for a lot of improvement. Today we did Fartlicks together, a fartlick, short sprints to raise your heart rate, then a walk a bit and then a sprint again. The whole while trying to break 4 years of bad habbits, like taking short steps instead of long steps. Okay, let me just tell you, if you think you are in awesome shape and you rock just do a couple of miles of fartlicking. Whew, I was beat, in fact it felt like I was in boot camp again. Whining the whole time to myself, about how I felt like I was going to die. So how is this making it on the blog you ask? I like to apply anything I do, to what is God teaching me in this moment through this exprience right now?
What I think He is teaching me today is this. Erica, you are great at going the distance with me, but when I put the pressure on, when I want you to get a little tougher and stronger, you whine. You whine and you are not trusting me. Oh, so you mean to tell me God, that I am a whiner. Yes, I am. When I get a little uncomfortable, I complain and stop focusing on God and start focusing on me. Do you do that? You don't have to say yes, but what should we do in those situations? It is like refocusing my stride, to retrian my mind to go back and focus on God. Whether it is by scripture, song or prayer, a refocus moment needs to happen. Do everything without complaining or arguing, so that you may become blameless and pure, children of God without fault in a crooked and depraved generation, in which you shine like the stars in the universe. Philippians 2:14-15 That is my start to do it without complainingnor arguing with God, so I can shine. Do you want to shine with me? Brothers, I do not consider myself yet yo have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus. Philippians 3:13-14 Do I forget what is behind me and press forward? Not all the time but, how much greater would we be if we did?
Just a thought in the light of day.
How do you Dance the Dance? You know your daily dance, the one that starts while you are still laying in bed. What do your thoughts immediately go to? Is it a YES, morning, I LOVE morning. Or maybe you like the ugh, 5 more minutes. Maybe its more of not another day, there is so much to do. How about thank you Jesus, for another day, help me dance with you and not on your toes. Lest today's pace be not mine but yours. I can tell you what my day does not start out with and if you have known me anytime at all, it would be the first choice. The whole woo hoo its morning thing, is not my thing. My sweet husband could say something sweet to me, but it is probably best not too. However, I do try to make the last choice in some form or fashion my choice. I find asking for help first thing makes my day, go a little better, even a little easier. Think about it this way your first thoughts are going to be what brings you threw your whole day not just the morning, but the whole thing. Am I saying that each day is perfect absolutely not, but dancing with the Maker and not against Him is a lot easier. I have been learning (daily) when I give Him my day and reassure Him it really is His and I am here to do what He has planned for me and not what I have planned for me. My days even though slammed packed, full from sun up to sum down. I don't have that rushed feeling everything just flows. I am not nagging children come on lets go, move, move, move. My pace (Gods pace) sets the pace for the rest of the house. When God is in charge completely, I can not step one his toes. I seem to notice, everything He has created, I can take it all in, praising God is not so tough. In fact it is effortless. Take today, we do everything today. We (the children and I) are moving non stop from one thing to the next. Even though we are running, I appreciated my run, there was extra time in the car to listen to his word, there wasn't traffic downtown this morning and there was a parking spot right in front of the store I needed to go to. Two weeks ago feeling rushed and overwhelmed, there wasn't a second to waste, I was cranky and so were my little ones. That day, I was all about toe stepping. That day the sun wasn't so shiny. Take time with me to dance your daily dance with the Creator. I promise you will be in the presence of greatness. There will be something new and beautiful, you see everyday but toady it will be amazing. Take time praise Him and give God your day.
"Daddy's girl, Daddy's girl, I am the center of my daddy's world." This is a song my husband sings to our girls. So cute and so true. Daddy's and girls they are just made for each other aren't they. Think about it from the first cry to the last good bye, that little girl has her daddy wrapped around their little fingers. Whether daddy is willing to admit it or not.
One of my husbands friends gave him some of the best words of wisdom ever. "Your daughter loves you now but when she a teenager she will break your heart." Can you imagine, breaking their precious daddy's heart?!? Well, I would like to say it is not true but how many of us mommas' broke our daddy's heart? Immediately he went to our oldest and asked her, you will always love me right? Yes, daddy I will...don't be silly. She even told him one time she is being bad because she wasn't getting enough kisses. Fast forward 6 years later. Poor daddy, kind of gets left overs, not that mommy has replaced him. She has just gotten older and "mature" loving on daddy is just not so cool any more.
When girls are little they think daddy's are the best thing in the whole world, better than sliced bread. When they get to about 7 and 8 daddy's are still cool but maybe not the sliced bread they once were. Ten, Eleven threw about twenty...forget about it. Daddy, you are not so cool any more, well at least you won't know how cool you are because I am way to cool to tell you I love you.
Of course there are catches to this theory like, I really love you when I really want my friend to come over or I really want to stay up late. But my all time favorite is when little sister wants to be with daddy too. Then daddy is like a rock star who will win over daddy? The youngest daughter with a single tear running down her face or the oldest who suddenly wants daddy too?
I will have to say today, my husband was a champion and did not choose one over the other but instead chose them both. So all three won, a beaming daddy with his two favorite girls.
Daddy's are the best thing since sliced bread, I know my daddy is.
Lately whether it is someone I know from a distance or someone I know personally, marriages are under attack. Marriages lately seem to be full of heart ache, full of hurt and full of wanting out. Why? Marriages that seem pretty solid shockingly too. Where does it come from? Should each of us run to counseling or run for a lawyer? How do you recognize there is something a miss. Is it a casual drift or an epiphany you wake up and go who is that man or woman laying next to me? How did we get here? Is any marriage immune or is it like a deadly disease waiting to strike?
Well I think, it isn't a one day you roll over and go ugh, or man I don't love you. It is like anything else, your marriage is like on the pinnacle of a mountain. At the highest point of a peak, just balancing there waiting for the wind to blow. When it does are you (as a couple) balanced enough to stay on top or do we slowly start drifting down one side of the mountain? Staying balanced takes a lot of work, going down one side or another might even seem fun, like you two are doing fine. Then you hit the base of the mountain unprepared and unaware that you were even sliding down. Does it have to be a drastic slide like infidelity? No, it doesn't it could be too much something else and not enough us. How many people does it take to keep your marriage on the pinnacle of that mountain? Three, you, your spouse and God at the center holding you two together so neither one of us slip. Well, that does sound great doesn't just keep God where he is supposed to be and everything will be all right, right? What happens, when life happens and God takes second or third and family gets third or forth? You start slipping down the mountain. What happens when you do not put effort into loving your spouse every day, even when you are tired? You start slipping down the mountain. How do you grasp hold of the mountain and start pulling yourself back up? Or is it to late to take the hike back up? Hiking takes work, effort and sometimes makes you breathless. The view from the top...is worth every bit though. There is a mountain back home that if you climb to the top of it before lunch on a clear day you can see Seattle from the haystack. breath taking and worth all the work you put into it.
Words are deadly, did you know that. He who guards his lips guards his life, but he who speaks rashly will come to ruin. Proverbs 13:3 Words are also builders. A wise man's heart guides his mouth, and his lips promote instruction. Proverbs 16:23 How you choose to use them states alot about your hearts condition. I know, because if I choose them to hurt, I am going to choose ones that sting and cut the deepest. That is called fighting dirty. Do I truly mean them, no, but it leaves a mark on my spouse and I will reap what words I have sown for a long time. What a about a nagging spouse? I mean they just never stop? How can I love that kind of person or live with that? A foolish son is his father's ruin, and a quarrelsome wife is like constant dripping. Proverbs 19:13 Oh I know, if I didn't stay on him or her they would never get anything done. Really? Do you have faith in your spouse or that God will help them?Better to live on a corner of the roof than share a house with a quarrelsome wife. Proverbs 21: 9 Are you like me, sometimes I look for the argument, maybe not on purpose, it might be my mood. But that does not justify the quarreling. Why do we do that? Why do we attack the ones we love? Bad day? The wrong thing said? Stress?
What about, well they just don't complete me anymore, there is just not any joy left. You are asking your spouse to fill a roll that only God is supposed to fill. You are asking a human to fill an impossible task. When you allow God to fill the love, joy and hope part. When you allow Him to complete you, you can love deeper and better. In Psalm 107 the psalmist repeats four times, Let them give thanks to the LORD for his unfailing love, hes wonderful deeds for men. Women are supposed to submit, be helpmate to their husbands, that does not make us less of a person. ( Ephesians 5:22 and Genesis 2:22-25) Husbands are to love their wives as Christ loves the church. (Ephesians 5:23).
There are no promises of uneventful, untroublesome, boring life where life is perfect all the time. There is not an immunity pill or magic formula, you could do everything "right" and still fall victim to trouble in your marriage. It is what you do in those times. Do you recognize it, accept it and say there is no hope for us. Or do you recognize it, accept it, and say there is hope with Christ and some disciple ship. Seek help from those older couples who have been married a long while, who have hit bottom but have climbed back to the top maybe even more than once. Finally, even if you fight, even if in the end, you are broken, crushed and feeling alone. Remember if at the bottom you can not fix it because someone is unwilling. You are in the hand of God, he has pieced you together, you are more than loved, He is singing over you right now. There is always hope in the creator. Life is full of land mines, full of disappointment and hurt. Cling to the fulcrum at the pinnacle of the mountain. When Christ is the center of you and your spouse, you can do all things.
